This article explores violent behavior within a relationship from the male abuser's perspective. A systemic approach was used, combining qualitative and quantitative information in two parallel studies. The first (Study 1) is a descriptive analysis of a group of men (N = 220) who participated in a program to address violence within the couple. In the second (Study 2), a subgroup of 8 participants was interviewed in-depth for describing and analyzing their perceptions of violence. The data analysis suggest that relationship violence (a) begins in the early stages of the relationship, (b) is long-term, (c) rarely includes serious physical aggression, (d) is dominated by a growing hostility and isolation, (e) is characterized by a lack of awareness and responsibility for the violent behavior, and (f) includes intentional and strategic use of violent behavior.